By Jordyn Damato
THE SELF LOVE LAB / @theselflovelab on Pinterest
Life isn’t easy and that’s a fact. Whether stressed over work, school, relationships, or the current state of the world—it’s hard to always feel put together and even worse to assume that we should always feel put together. The truth is that life is hard, and we forget it is okay to admit it. There is importance in knowing it’s okay to not be okay. I would argue that knowledge is crucial for your overall well-being.
Therapy feels like a taboo subject because people can instantly assume something horribly ground-breaking has happened to you– immediately viewing you as a “victim.” And maybe we all are victims in a sense. That being said, there is shame associated with therapy, shame that shouldn’t be there.
Feelings, like circumstances, constantly change. If you’re feeling sad or anxious consistently you may be in the market for some therapy. Yes, a vent session with your closest friends and a bottle of wine can be considered a form of therapy, but really, speaking to a professional outside of your circle is a critical part of the healing process.
Let’s talk about the benefits of therapy: your therapist legally cannot tell your secrets. We have all been betrayed in our lives by people we trusted the most and that alone is a soul-crushing experience. Maybe you don’t share your struggles with friends or family because you fear they won’t keep them private or you don’t want to burden them. The fact that your therapist is your own personified diary is a privilege many people don’t take advantage of.
Not to mention the obvious, therapists are intelligent people. They have their job because they know what they’re doing—they know how to handle conflict and bad feelings and they are willing to work with you in any way you prefer. Maybe you want some coping mechanisms, a safe space to vent, or some third party opinions; whatever it may be, therapists are trained professionals equipped with the skills to help you.
Lots of people can be wary of therapy, arguing that therapists don’t actually care about their clients and are merely waiting for a check. I personally wouldn’t sign up for a life of listening to other people’s problems if I didn’t have the empathy or care for people with the strength to ask for help. That would be like saying firefighters don’t care about putting out fires—they just want a paycheck. Yes, money is a necessity in the world we live in, but there are plenty of people who believe helping others and saving lives is as much of a necessity as making a living is.
You don’t need to be severely traumatized to go to therapy. If you live with a pit in your stomach, sad thoughts in your brain, and don’t feel like you have any safe outlets in your life, attending three sessions could change everything for you.
A lot of the time, we struggle to make sense out of our feelings until we speak them aloud. Other times, we think we’re upset about one thing and then realize that stems from another thing in life. The truth is that feelings are cycles and our emotional responses come from somewhere within ourselves—utilizing therapy as a tool to recognize these patterns is life-changing.
When you know yourself, the world around you becomes much clearer.
We should normalize that we are human beings and we are designed to struggle. It’s not realistic to have everything all figured out at all times and definitely not helpful to assume we are all feeling good every minute of every day. If you think your problems aren't that bad or feel ashamed to seek therapy, take this as your sign to do it. It never hurts to ask for help—in fact, it could even save your life.
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